summer

it's evening, after a long hot July day. dinner is done, dishes are finished and the house is hot. i am sitting on the deck, in the shade reading. there is nowhere else to be, no homework or practice, no bed time. the kids are playing, anything. football, baseball, fixing bikes and dirtbikes. running back and forth between our house and the neighbors, and jumping in the neighbors pool when they get hot. it's too hot to be inside. and somehow for these couple of hours they manage to get along.

another hour and the house will cool down. the kids are going fishing, i watch them walk away...3 sets of legs hanging out of shorts or swimming trunks they have had on all day. long tan backs, 3 heads with dark hair that is a little lighter than it was a month ago. i watch them head to the pond, the youngest taking a couple of running steps every once in a while to keep up. they are my boys, and i am in awe that this is the case. i start to wonder for a minute if this might be the last summer for times like this. will the oldest be too busy next year? probably. i push the thought away, and enjoy tonight.

i read my book and listen to them talking, yelling and playing. the sky gets a little darker and the air is considerably cooler. soon the light will be gone and i won't be able to read. the kids return and head inside. i watch the lightning bugs start and watch for the first stars. and listen to my boys.

when i first became a mom, i thought i would remember everything. but the big things sometimes overshadow the little. and they are forgotten. i hope none of us ever forgets how wonderful nights like this are. this is summer to me. this is what my thoughts return to in feb, when it seems like it will never be warm again. and i hope my boys will have nights like this with their sons.