time

I received the kids school schedules for the upcoming year last week. i know it is near, and while i may have complained (loudly) about being ready for school start, here is the truth. i'm not. not really. yes i'm ready to have some structure back to the day, and i'm ready to regain control (yeah like i ever really had any) over my home. but i am not ready for this school year.

my oldest will be a junior. a junior...A JUNIOR in high school. now i know once football camp starts...BAM!!! next thing i know it's Christmas...and double BAM...it's May. my time with him is growing short and i'm not anywhwere near ready. not that i'm wishing time away...hardly. i was just talking to a mom who has a son leaving for college this week, and she said how busy this past year had been. she had really wanted to savor and enjoy his senior year and it was impossible..there wasn't enough time.

now anyone who knows me in real life will tell you, i live in like some kind of time vacuum. i say things like "wasn't that a month ago?" about things that happened in march. time just flies. and i can't control it. my son is becoming a man in front of my eyes, they all are. how can this be? where have 17 years gone?!!? it is unthinkable. and honestly...i'd trade and go through it all over again, just to have that little boy, with his green hat and his love affair with Barney, back . even for just one day.